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Anatomy of a Good "Holiday" No: How to Say "I Can't Gift the Way I Used to " This year

and doing it nicely to preserve the relationship

If you have been victim to a tech layoff this year, gifting the way you used to can feel like its not on the cards this year.

How do you have the tough conversation with family or friends. Here are three key steps to help you navigate this with grace, along with a script.


Step 1: Manage expectations

You can do this via an email or phone call. Do it early. Do it often.

Step 2: Use a script

While it’s natural to want to avoid difficult conversations, I find that scripts empower me in tough situations. PS. You don’t need to provide every detail—just enough to help them see where you’re coming from.

Step 3: Offer an Alternative

Instead of traditional gifts, consider offering your time, skills, or a heartfelt gesture. Suggest activities like a coffee date, a movie night, or simply a phone call to catch up. These alternatives can be even more meaningful than a physical gift.


The Script

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Joya’s Substack
Anatomy of a Good "No"
Scripts on how to say 'no' and be your own best advocate